There are many things in this life that are measurable, some are far easier to measure than others. Measuring self-worth can be complicated. Unfortunately, many people use unreliable factors to determine their value as human beings. Often, this involves measuring oneself against others, instead of focusing on intrinsic value. We use external factors to measure our self-worth which can cause us to have unrealistic and self-defeating beliefs about ourselves. While it can be complicated measuring self-worth, you are in control of how you view yourself and you can change this for the better. 

The Fine Line between Self-Worth and Self-Esteem

Self-worth is referred to interchangeably as self-esteem. However, the dictionary explains that self-worth is the sense of one’s personal value or worth as a human being. It is an internal state of being arising from how you understand, love, and accept yourself. Regardless of what others think about you or unfavorable circumstances, the way you value yourself remains timeless and unchanging.

On the other hand, self-esteem is more immediate and depends on external factors over which you have no personal control, such as how others compare to you on a particular day. Self-esteem can be influenced by how you think others perceive you.

Feeling Good or Bad about Who You Are

The way you opt to measure your self-worth will greatly influence the choices you make, your views about life, and the way you feel about yourself. It’s important to measure your value not by external events in your life, but by factors you can control.

The present competitive culture tends to dictate that we need to be special and above average in order to feel good about ourselves. While this may be possible, it can’t be the case all the time. Searching for self-worth by constantly drawing comparisons with others means fighting a battle you can’t always win. In reality, there is always someone more attractive, more successful, or happier than you are. We cannot base our worth on these factors. .

Studies cited by the American Psychological Association reveal that people who base their self-esteem and self-worth on what others think have more psychological and emotional concerns, such as stress, anger, and relationship conflicts. They also report higher levels of alcohol and substance abuse as well as eating disorders among respondents who based their self-worth on external factors. On the other hand, those who base their self-worth on their own personal value feel better about themselves.

If you want to maintain a healthy sense of self, you need to believe in yourself regardless of life’s inevitable ups and downs. You need to feel that you’re worthy of all the good things that come your way: happiness, health, success, riches, and love. A true sense of self-worth will not be shaken for long when facing difficulties, disappointments, or limitations. You accept yourself, including your flaws and weaknesses. No external factor can change the way you feel about yourself at your core. That alone makes you powerful enough to move forward with self-confidence.

The Quest for Self-Worth Starts with Counseling

If you feel unworthy or undeserving, or if you don’t like yourself very much right now, you have the power to change this. Finding a supportive counselor can be your first step in the process of improving the way you view yourself.

Carolina Counseling Services – Southern Pines, NC contracts with skilled licensed therapists. The right counselor can give you the tools to recognize the relationships between your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. In a safe and supportive therapeutic environment, you can begin to view yourself in a more positive, realistic way. Call CCS today to schedule your first appointment.

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