The term self-esteem is often confused with self-confidence. Whereas the latter can be described as the feeling of trust in one’s abilities, self-esteem refers to a person’s overall sense of self-worth and value. In simplest terms, self-esteem means appreciating yourself. Having healthy self-esteem does not mean that you believe yourself to be perfect, it means you acknowledge your shortcomings and choose to work on them rather than letting yourself be defined by them. 

Self-esteem can ebb and flow throughout our lives. It can be low or high, healthy or unhealthy. How you value yourself is a reflection of your thoughts, feelings and actions. Of all the judgments you make in life, your judgment about yourself is likely the most important.  Your level of self-esteem can help predict certain outcomes, including happiness, achievement, relationships, etc.

An adequate amount of positive self-esteem is vital for healthy development. A healthy level of it will allow you to feel good about yourself and can allow you to feel proud about your abilities and accomplishments. If you are, however, experiencing low self-esteem that is pervasive and detrimental to the overall quality of your life, therapy is an excellent way to improve the way you view yourself.

The Development of Self-Esteem

Self-esteem develops across your lifespan. In early childhood, feelings and experiences of being valued and understood contribute to healthy self-esteem. Unconditional love and support can provide a sense of security and reassurance of self-worth. When children don’t experience this it can also negatively affect the way they view themselves. 

Low self-esteem in childhood can easily carry on into adulthood. Parental neglect, rejection, loneliness, bullying, negative body image, trauma, socioeconomic status and emotional health issues are some factors leading to self-doubt that may eventually result in low self-esteem. Negative or unfavorable experiences and troubled relationships can also impact self-image. Counseling can help to address your self-worth and even improve your self-esteem. 

Recognizing the Signs of Low Self-Esteem

Low levels of self-esteem carry distinctive characteristics, feelings, and behaviors typically considered as benchmarks for determining if it is beneficial to explore therapy designed to improve the way you view yourself.

The following signs and behaviors are often associated with low self-esteem:

• Lack of self-confidence
• Feeling of worthlessness
• Avoidant behavior
• Feeling of incompetence
• Feeling unloved
• Lack of assertiveness
• Preoccupation with negative thoughts
• Pretension
• Social withdrawal
• Indecisive behavior
• Lack of generosity
• Distorted views of self and others
• Inability to focus in the present
• Self-neglect

It is important to mention that the list is only indicative and not exhaustive. Knowing the common signs can help you or someone you know take the necessary steps to improve their self-esteem.

Can Therapy Improve Self-Esteem?                           

Self-esteem is a state of mind, and you have the power to change it. Change may mean taking a hard look at yourself if your mind is filled with negative feelings and judgments toward yourself. Keep in mind that you have control over how you view yourself.

Counseling can help you to explore where your negative views of self originated and challenge these belief systems that are keeping you trapped. You can change the way you speak to yourself, you are in control of your narrative. Working with a skilled, licensed therapist contracted with CCS can help you begin to do this. Start viewing yourself in a more positive light. Call CCS today to schedule your first appointment.